Loving Somebody Who Attacks You

From an article about Paradox in Wikipedia:

… it may be considered that an ethical admonition to “love thy neighbour” is not just in contrast with, but in contradiction to an armed neighbour actively trying to kill you: if he or she succeeds, you will not be able to love him or her. But to preemptively attack them or [even just] restrain them is not usually understood as loving. This might be termed an ethical dilemma.

I’ve been there. It isn’t pretty. And I never know what I should do to make things better.

Or just to be able to love properly.

And no, Tit for tat doesn’t work.